If you have a blog, the law of the Internet says that you have to write an end-of-year review – a bit like how newspapers have to have a ‘big crossword’ at Christmas.

When I look back at a year, I’m usually quite critical because there are more unachieved goals than ones to tick off. This year is different.

Undoubtedly the big achievement of the year was to complete the stand-up comedy course at the MAC, and then go on to do some gigs. As well as providing the opportunity to perform, and so banishing a phobic-like fear of performing live, it has vastly improved my ability to write proper ‘jokes’, rather than relying on character-driven lines. I also met some great people on the course who share a love of comedy, and have some very exciting creative projects in the pipeline for 2012 as a result.

Jonny and Simon, with whom I’m working on ‘The Comedy Fix’, have both been inspirational to me. Jonny has continued to pursue his goal of making stand-up comedy his career, with many successful gigs and a tenacity that puts the rest of us to shame. Simon has produced some fine material that is intelligently crafted and innovative in subject and approach. They are both fine people to work with, and I trust and respect their feedback and views.

Trying to work out my ‘next steps’ for 2012 is exciting and frustrating in equal measure. I have only dipped my toe in the world of stand-up, but have done enough to realise the huge commitment that’s needed to progress in any meaningful way. My instinct is to want to do more, because it had such a positive effect on me personally – particularly in terms of self-confidence – but I wonder if the performing aspect of my output might be better served in other ways, such as in sketches, improv, or even part of a double-act. The material I wrote for the stand-up gigs didn’t quite ‘fit’ with the ‘performance persona’ that I wanted to project – I suspect because I am not as comfortable being funny as myself, rather than the silly voices and characters I create on the podcasts. Maybe character comedy is the way to go. It’s all possible in 2012.

‘The Comedy Fix’ on Rhubarb Radio was an enjoyable experience, although there were numerous frustrations along the way. Problems in nailing the show to the level of professionalism that the three of us wanted meant that we were often left wondering whether we had created something unmissable or unlistenable. I often blamed the equipment for this, but I suspect that I often wasn’t on best form in the 10 til midnight slot, despite a huge amount of preparation. In the end, Rhubarb experienced a very sad end, although I have to say that we’d pretty much decided to go before events took over and the station ceased broadcasting. A few loyal members remain, and I sincerely hope they succeed in reviving the station to its former glory.

Part of the reason I didn’t do more stand-up after August was because I started a new job. Although both the new job and the stand-up were challenging in positive ways, doing both at the same time was too much to cope with, and I felt that there was a risk of not applying myself to the job as much as was needed. I am still finding my feet in the job to a small extent, but I’m now in a good position from where I can start to focus more on spare time activities.

The other big creative challenge of 2011 was ‘Nanowrimo’ – the worldwide phenomenon of writing a novel in 30 days in November. It proved too big a challenge, and the required 1666 words per night was never close to being achieved. I crashed out spectacularly after just two weeks, with a woefully under-par 8300 words written. (50,000 was the target).

Despite the lack of a successful outcome, it was a useful exercise in that I learned much about my own writing process. I was averaging around 800 words a day until I hit a brick wall, which came about due to a lack of planning. I basically ran out of plot, realising that in my head I had summarised the middle 30,000 words of my novel in a sentence. Which is quite difficult to overcome when you are already crashing through deadlines.

Also, I hadn’t realised how competitive it could seem – the community aspect is supposed to be very supportive and inspirational, with a kind of ‘we’re all in this together’ feel to it. That does get slightly lost, however, when you’re struggling to write 500 words a day and others are posting updates like ‘Phew! Just reached 45000!’ after only a day and a half. On day 1, I was maintaining my generosity, saying ‘well done you!’ to my laptop screen; by day 14 I was muttering ‘smug bastards’ under my breath and secretly hating them all for writing more than me. Whether that makes me a terrible person or just human is not for me to say.

There have been other highlights of the year, but it’s 2am now, and I need to sleep. Part 2 soon.