Archive for June, 2008

A Proud Moment

It’s probably been about 20 years since I last had a kickabout with a football, if you don’t count boofing a ridiculously airy beachball along the sand at Weston-Super-Mare, or tapping my little nephew’s half-size rainbow ball around the garden.

So I was particularly proud of myself today when I actually managed to avoid making a complete pratt of myself. Having just stepped off the bus, a mis-hit ball flung itself into my path from the group of youths who were playing with it in the park.

Now, bear in mind that a simple tap back along the ground was out of the question thanks to the rather high fence that lay betwixt. Or, if your not from the fourteenth century, ‘between’.

So a ‘boof’ as I believe they’re called, was required. The potential for disaster and humiliation was high. How high? Well, have a look at this from the Armando Iannucci shows:

Thanks goodness, then, that (1) my foot actually connected with the ball, and (2) I sent it on a trajectory that put it over the fence, and in the general vicinity of play.

I’m so proud of myself – I managed to score one for my people to help dispel the myth that we can’t kick a ball for toffee.

In fact, I refuse to kick a ball for toffee. Or indeed any confectionery. Competent sports semi-professionals such as myself say ‘eat healthy, kids’. And for goodness sake, don’t make a fart of yourself when returning a ball in the park.

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Recommendation: traidcraft.co.uk

If you haven’t discovered it yet, pop over to traidcraft.co.uk for a great selection of fair trade products.

Their ‘Geobars’ can be found in Sainsburys and are absolutely delicious. In fact, they’re so delicious, I seem to have got myself addicted to them. Luckily, they’re not too unhealthy.

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The New Podcast

Before we get into the self-regarding nonsense that I’ve written below, if you’re a podcaster yourself, please do go and vote in the Podcast Peer Awards for my Liverpudlian friend Graham Holland. He’s been nominated for his excellent show, ‘The It’s a Frog’s Life Acoustic Podcast’ and deserves to win. Off you pop, then to www.podcastpeers.org and I’ll be waiting for you when you get back.

All done? Cheers ears. Be warned – from this point on, it’s all me, me, me, with a big dollop of me on the side. Danny Baker calls it self-regarding nonsense, and it definitely is, but I’m less uncomfortable about that than I would have been a while back. I’m the new tougher me now, you know. I do weight-training and everything.

Here goes, then. Stop reading at any time if you become nauseous.

I’ve suspected this for a long time, but now the evidence is clear: I’m at my strongest creatively when I’m under a huge amount of pressure.

Now is not the time for creating comedy podcasts: I have a business that is putting me under huge pressure at the moment, with long days and deadlines looming, and in virtually every other area of my life, things are quite stressful. Even the technology is conspiring against me as my laptop has decided to start cutting out suddenly, and there’s no money in the pot for a replacement, or even a service. But somehow – somehow! – I’m managing to pull together a new podcast that I’m very proud of. I absolutely can’t wait to release it.

Basically, the effort has been put into upping the energy and pace of the show. There are more shorter, punchier segments, and the longer sketches have been rewritten within an inch of their lives until the gag-rate stays consistent. There’s a new intro sequence that’s very different from what’s come before, and the style of the comedy is – I hope – a bit cheekier than before, although I still haven’t gone down the ‘adult content’ route. I think that would be a mistake.

Show 40 is still being recorded and edited to make it a real showcase piece that will bear repeat listens and act as a strong example of what I can do when I really put my mind to it.

I listen back to previous CLPs and am usually quite critical – my ultimate aim is to produce something that is on a par with anything on Radio 4 (apart from technical quality) because I know I’m capable of doing it. On a lot of shows, though, I’ve placed more importance on getting a show out, and it has often been at the expense of the quality of writing. I’m not doing that any more. Taking the time to write show 40 has reminded me what a huge buzz it is to get the comedy ‘on the nose’.

Every creative bone in my body is being put into taking the show to a new level. I’m fighting astronomical odds to get noticed as a writer/performer in a virtual sea teaming with talent. But I don’t care whether it takes another 3 years or another 30. Success, when it comes, will just be that bit sweeter as a result.

Want spoilers?

Well, there’s a new regular feature called ‘CLP’s History of Britain’ which has been flying around as an idea for over a year. New Topical Pish stuff gets adapted and included as a short insert, and there’s a regular satire on sell-out kids TV that I’m also hoping to use as a viral.

The new show 40 will be out by July 10th at the latest.

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Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawn

I’ve been so tired this week. After quite a few weeks milling about in the office, I’m doing some tutoring full-time for a group of teenagers who are on an alternative curriculum programme with a training provider. They’ve all fallen out of the normal school system for one reason or another and are generally very challenging to teach. It’s rewarding, but knackering, and I’ll be doing it until the end of July as well as keeping the business running with my partner.

I seem to be waking up earlier and earlier – 5.30 on Monday, moving to 4.30 by Friday – which is a bit annoying when I don’t need to get up until 6.30.

I’ve started to crank up the fitness regime a little, as I’m trying to bulk up a bit with weights, which means eating a lot more than usual. Because of this, I’m starting to put on weight again in the wrong places, and so I’ve decided to add a weekly Saturday morning run to the regular gym sessions. Two Saturdays so far – both fine weather – although the real challenge will be when it’s throwing it down like it was on Tuesday.

The comedy is flowing once again, so I think it was a good decision to do a couple of non-comedy shows (although one is a comedy quiz). I’m really looking to releasing show 40 – I’m really pleased with the material I’ve got so far, and the new start-up sequence gives some added energy to the show. There’s also the prospect of a regular format to follow, which is something I’ve failed to be successful with so far. There’s also a Facebook tie-in that will amuse me -if no one else – but might take some time to set up.

Not a very interesting post, this, but I just felt in the mood to write a few words at the end of a knackering week. It’s been quite stressful, but thankfully Bill Oddie has been there to transport me out of Birmingham and into the wilds of Norfolk and Scotland. If you don’t watch it, you’ll have no idea why Springwatch has become compulsive viewing. But it has. And long may it continue.

Telly-wise, I’ve also really enjoyed the two-part Doctor Who that concluded tonight. A first-class story with my favourite dramatic ingredients – mystery, intrigue, and confused time-lines. This series has been excellent, with Catherine Tate being a true surprise in turning out to be so good.

I watch 5 minutes of the Big Brother launch show, then turned it off quickly. It was actually scarier than Doctor Who. So I’m pledging to write some comedy every night when it’s on instead of watching it.

That’s it. I’m still yawning. Sorry this was such a non-blog, but I… you… if…. zzzzzzzzzzz

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